The person who listens has to listen to the words. He also has to listen for the meaning of silences. He has to understand motives and intentions. He not only tries to understand what is being said, he also has to be sensitive to what is not being said.
The speaker needs to be aware that less than twenty per cent of his meaning is expressed in words. The rest pours out of him through his tone and body language. He who speaks has to be willing to repeat what he says in subtle ways till it sinks deep into the heart of the listener.
Listening and speaking is like playing a game of ping pong. Building ideas involves both participants in an intimate interweaving of ideas, snow-balling them into bigger ideas, supporting speculatively risky ideas. The positive field and the supportive climate full of respect for each other leads to collaboratively building new ideas.